Thinking of him...

I keep checking the Creative Court April challenges because I'm excited about having signed up. And I enjoyed making the sig tags that I managed for one of them. But, man. Every time I go to look at the other rounds, I get so stressed because I just don't understand how they work. They clearly seem easy enough to follow for others, but the points for each thing. Trying to figure out what counts towards the monthly theme or not. Whether or not it counts if you use the textures and colors, if the media itself isn't based around the theme?

I've got zero idea. I did make a pretty icon with the provided textures, but have nothing to do with it because I don't know how to go about submitting it.

Idk, I'm just kinda bummed that I'm having trouble following along with something that's obviously pretty simple.

...And the new layout for posting does not make me eager to use it... >_>

But I wanted to come and just post about whatever.

I have been writing, I promise! IDK that anyone out there really cares that I've been writing, but I have been. Nearly every day I write something, but I haven't managed to finish anything. I've got a J2 fic that I wrote, I'm planning on posting it in the next week. It's been "done" for a while, but it's going through a rewrite to expand it because I don't feel like it's really done yet.

Still working, slowly, on my Cinderella!Sam/Gabriel au fic. I found all of my chapter notes on it a couple weeks ago when going through my papers for my Novel Writing Class. I thought I'd lost them forever, so I nearly squeaked when I found them in class.

Realized in the last two weeks that I lost my Original Fiction story I'd been working on since the start of high school. I'd still been working on it up to the first semester of my Novel Writing Class last year. But my external harddrive got corrupted, then my laptop died. I hadn't had it backed up on anything else, and the e-mail I sent of it to a friend was so long ago that it's since been gotten rid of. *cries* I'm actually working on a rewrite from scratch and the first chapter is better than my original first chapter, but I know there are things I'll forget. 80/90 pages of work, just gone. :(

Some good news (imo), I found some old bunnies I'd planned on writing today. I was going through one of my old journal/notebooks. I found my original scenes from my Belle!Sam/Beast!Gabriel fic in there, as well as chapters of Mystery Spot Misunderstanding (omg, so long ago). But there were also two pages of bunnies for Sam/Gabriel, Jared/Jensen, and even one Superwho fic... I am pretty excited to start working on them, but I've got these other things I would like to finish first, you know?

There's a first time Sam/Gabriel fic with outsider!Sam I was working on around May of last year... It's reached ~6k words and then I just got stuck. I really like what I've written so far, but I need to figure out how to get them together and decide how I want to end it...

Another fic is a first time Sam/Gabriel with Sam having been split into two Sams: confident!Sam and insecure!Sam. I've gotten...~5k words of it written. I know how it ends. I know how I want to get there. But every time I open up the doc to work on it, I'm unable to figure out exactly how to make it work. I'm stuck on just how to create the confrontation that I know I need between the characters. >.<

Oh, and to my shame, I have been writing a fiction in a completely different fandom. I have about 45-50 pages (teeny pages in my little True Blood notebook I got at Comic Con last year) of HP re-sorting fic written. IDEK what I'm doing with it. I just know that I got the idea for it sometime last year or so and have been writing it in short little spurts over the last couple months. I actually really like what I've written so far, but I feel so bad that I've gotten so much more written for that than any of my OTP. ;_;

I've been tempted to just post what's written and hoping that any comments I get will motivate me to get them done. But I did the WIP-posting thing with Mystery Spot Misunderstanding. Getting so many comments was amazing, but I hate keeping readers waiting for so long in between, especially w/ no guarantee that it will get finished for a really long time.

So yeah, there's a bit of an update for anyone who is interested. :D

*randomness*

~ Willow

Snagged from yellowbulma.

1. Deangirl or Samgirl?
I have been a Sam!girl since Pilot and I will be forever.

2. Casgirl, yes or no?
Depends on the season and episode. Season 4? Not at all. Season 5? Mostly, yes. I even wanted more of him. Season 6? You know, I mostly was a Cas!girl because I understood that he couldn't always help and Dean was just being an asshole for just expecting his help all the time. But when he messed with Sam's wall, no.

3. Favorite season?
Jeez, um. This is hard. It's close between 1 and 2... I think 1? But they're really close.

4. Favorite episode(s) from your favorite season?
I love Skin. And all the episodes with Meg.

5. Season you're most likely to re-watch?
I rewatch a lot of the stand-alone/filler eps in Season 4, but full seasons I'm more likely to rewatch... Probably season 1.

6. Season you hate the most?
Season 4, all the way. They started making Dean worse with his attitude and holier-than-thou/self-righteous attitude than he'd been in the seasons before. And made Sam out to be a bad guy when he tried to hold onto anything to keep himself alive for months when Dean couldn't last 2 days without him.

7. Favorite episode of the current season?
Pfft.. Time For a Wedding? I dunno. They've spaced them out so much this season I can't even remember all of them right now. But that one had me rollin'.

8. Least favorite episode from the current season?
The Born-Again Identity. I won't be able to watch it a second time and I didn't want to even watch it the first time around.

9. Favorite angel?
Gabriel.

10. Least favorite angel?
...That's a really hard question. It's between Uriel and Zachariah. And I think I'll choose Uriel because he was so evil to Sam.

11. Favorite demon?
YED all the way. Gawd I miss him. And I really love Meg 1.o.

12. Least favorite demon?
Ruby 2.o

13. Favorite one-episode character?
They've made so many of them characters that came back... HMMM... You know, I really liked Sarah Blake.

14. Sam's hair looked best in which season?
FFFFFF, IDK. Not Season 4. Season 4 hair was awful. _{Season 4 was awful overall.} You know, I think I like Season 2 hair a lot. Just enough over his forehead that he had bangs, and they can be flipped or pushed behind his ear. But not non-existent as they've been for so long.


15. If the show would have ended the way Kripke wanted it to, with Sam and Dean battling each other and jumping into the hole together (and God might show mercy on them, idk), would you have preferred that?
No way.

16. Best cast character throughout the whole show?
IDK. Almost all of them? Jared really does make an excellent Sam. And Jensen plays an awesome Dean.

17. Do you think Chuck is God?
I like to think if he was, he would be more involved.

18. Who's a hotter psychic, Patrica Arquette, Jennifer Love Hewitt or Sam?
Sam, all the way. ;D

19. Freedom or Peace?
Freedom for sure

20. Dimples, freckles, eye-crinkles, bowlegs, bangs, woobie frowns or jaw clinches?
LOL, dimples, bangs, and jaw clinches ;D

21. Favorite kind of monster?
Vengeful spirits.

22. Weapon of choice?
Love the Colt.

23. Favorite death?
Don't have one. I don't like when any of them die. I will admit to having LMAO at Dean's deaths in Mystery Spot.

24. Favorite minor character's death?
NONE. I DON'T LIKE ANY OF THE DEATHS. OKAY.

25. Pre-apocalyptic, apocalyptic or post-apocalyptic?
Pre-apocalyptic.

26. Scariest episode?
Bloody Mary. That episode scared me, ngl. And it was the goriest the show had gotten at the time which was another big shock to it for me.

27. Best song that mattered for a scene? (you can't choose Carry on Wayward Son)
"Bad Moon Rising" in "Devil's Trap"

28. Best and worst young versions of characters?
Dude. Colin Ford was the best young!Sam everevereverever. Worst..? HMMM. BB!Sammy, from, like, the Shtriga episode.

29. Characters I ship like crazy?
Sam and Gabriel. *nodnodnod*

30. Favorite female character?
That would be Ellen, for sure. I miss her so much.

31. Best and worst season intro and finale?
Best season intro..? um.. IDK. I don't quite understand the question, I guess. Maybe if it's the "Then"/"Last Season" it would be Season 2? Best finale is Season 1.
Worst opening, I have no idea. Probably Season 6 because Sam isn't Sam and Dean lets other hunters walk all over him even though he's way better than they'd ever be.

(The headdesk icon is the closest one I have to "ded", so)

I'M SO EXCITED AND HAPPY, I CAN'T EVEN.

Okay, so. Backstory, or whatever.

I'm taking a Novel Writing class this semester. I couldn't take any of the classes I actually need, but I needed to take at least 1 class this semester to get my parents to stop looking at me like I do nothing since I still haven't been able to find a job. :/

So, I was too afraid to join the SciFi/Fantasy group because they were loud with big personalities and crazy intimidating. I joined Mixed Genres and decided, since I didn't think I could write a fantasy story, to try my hand at some sort of thriller/mystery. I've done the first 4 assignments with this idea in mind.

But I decided last week I was going to change my project to a fantasy story I've been working on for years. It would be easier to meet the word count requirement and I would be opening up this story I've been trying to get motivated to turn into something better. I figured it would be okay because one person is writing a paranormal novel and another person is writing one with a person with special gifts, so obviously fantasy was still allowed, or at least people with powers are.

I turned in the first 3 assignments last week for the teacher to read and leave me feedback for. These were for my first idea, right? But I was afraid that they sucked because the people in my group thought it sounded more like a comedy than a thriller and that totally shot my confidence to be able to write it, which is part of what prompted me to switch.

But I got the teacher's feedback back tonight and. O_O For my synopsis she wrote, "Good plot. You've done a good job establishing three unique characters with plenty of conflict. This can make a good thriller."

And for my character descriptions/biographies she said, "Good work - very comprehensive. You've given all your characters very 3-D personalities and lots of good psychological motivations." --- I about died already here, btw.

The third assignment was a character sketch. I had to put one of my characters into a scene with conflict in order to show their reactions. This is the one that pretty much killed me ded 'cause I thought the sketch was going to get awful feedback since it was so much shorter than the other ones in my group.

Her feedback: "Very good writing. You jump right into the action, and immediately create tension. Good use of sensory details. This is a good sketch." AND THERE ARE NOTES THROUGHOUT WITH LITTLE THINGS SAYING "Excellent contrast" AND "Good emotion".

AND GUYS. I'M GOING TO KEEP WORKING ON THIS ORIGINAL STORY INSTEAD OF THE FANTASY ONE. BECAUSE. IT DOESN'T SUCK APPARENTLY.

*wibble* It's thanks to fanfiction that I've gotten the practice to be able to get such good feedback on my first try in this class and I just want to say how much I appreciate all the comments I've gotten on my fics all over again because. Wow. I wouldn't have done nearly as well if I hadn't felt encouraged enough to keep writing for Supernatural. *wipes tear*

This has been one helluva crazy year. Some good things have happened. Some bad things. It's the year I got to keep my room as my own rather than switching it out yet again. The year my sister almost managed to break it off with her asshole boyfriend, only to decide she couldn't do it. The year I got close to my older sister again, getting to hang out with her and my niece all the time. :D And the year that my mom had to move out to Michigan for a couple weeks to take care of my Grandma (who's doing better now) and we had to rely on my Dad for groceries and the like (*snort*).

But it's also the year I finally got my learner's permit and have started driving. And that my best friend and her boyfriend have been talking about buying a house of their own. I wrote 24 stories (40 something if you count drabbles) and a lot were over 1k words which just blows my mind. Still a die hard Sam/Gabriel OTPer even if it seems most of my fave authors have moved on to my Anti-OTP or other fandoms. And I even discovered a love of Clark/Lex (Smallville) and Cherik (X-Men: First Class) and even some McFassy for the RPS side of it.

Overall, I think it's been a good year. It could have been better (especially if my little sister could have finally thrown her bf to the curb for the really crappy things he did) and it could have been worse (still got a roof over our heads, relatively in good health). I've got family and friends around and I'm pretty thankful for it. :D

I hope that everyone has a wonderful New Year. Especially those of you who might have had it rough in 2011.

Happy New Year

It'd be cool if LJ had a thing like tumblr has Tumblr Savior. So that I wouldn't ever see anything about Season 7 unless I chose to. hehehehehe


Also, wow. It's been awhile since I've posted anything here. But I'm working on my sabriel_mini and I've reached the minimum word count so now it's just a matter of getting the story to the ending. :D